Module #21 of the ADHD Success Club program I teach how to pull off more effortless ADHD events. In other words, prepare for life events that add lots of extra tasks into our already overly-full ADHD lives. Here’s Maya’s take-away. – dr
For normal people daily tasks, routines, and procedures provide a structure that helps them live and work with consistency; however, for me the details often send me into a tailspin where I’m confused and all over the place. When an extra event is added to my life, this tailspin can spiral out of control where I am ruled by procrastination, overwhelm, anxiety, frustration, and ‘shoulding’.
(A side note on Shoulding. In this week’s ADHD Success Club module, Dana advises the Success Club to accept the reality of ADHD and to follow this rule of life: “Quit shoulding on yourself!” She explains that when you are shoulding on yourself, you are taking on other people’s expectations of how things should be done instead of finding what works for you. She asserts that freeing yourself of this can be life changing.)
To prepare for effortless ADHD events, I heard loudly and clearly that:
1) I need to get clear about what needs to be done and when it should be done, and
2) I need to simplify and accept and work with who I am.
Extra events take time to plan and execute. Some examples in my life include travel and vacation, extra work projects, parties for kids, and holiday celebrations. Also, the times I say “yes” to extra teaching, committees, and projects are often events. Normally I plan for these extras in a haphazard way leaving me sleep-deprived, stressed out, and cranky.
Neglecting the consistent pattern of an event: planning, advanced tasks, last minute tasks, and follow up is counter-intuitive. If I neglect to acknowledge the patterns or try to think of them all at once, I will continue to make this more complicated than it needs to be. However, breaking them down will If I begin to work through Dana’s three-part planning system, I will alleviate some stress by planning and prioritizing in a way that I won’t be looking at what I “should have” done but I will be focused on simplifying each step of the way.
I’ve begun the brainstorming and picturing for my next vacation and by doing that I was able to capture what needs to be done. Soon I will put the tasks for the trip on a timeline. Trying this might help me go to bed at a decent hour the night before I leave on my trip, and it also might help me so I’m not tripping over an unpacked suitcase a week after I return from vacation.
On my next post, I’ll share the details of executing this plan for more effortless ADHD events. I’m excited to try it because I truly think that my procrastination has often been tied to my lack of clarity in what to do when. As I find myself getting clear on what needs to be done when I think I am beginning to see that prioritization is really about simplicity and steps. I truly believe this is something where I am beginning to grow as I continue my journey to success.
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