Maya, our guest blogger, struggles with ADHD Success this week. I long for magic wands. Sadly, they don’t exist. Living easier with ADHD takes awareness, skills, patience, and baby steps. As my fitness coach enjoys saying, ‘What doesn’t challenge you doesn’t change you.’ Here is Maya’s blog for the week:
When my ADHD brain drives me, I am the hamster perpetually running on the wheel. . . running in circles. Harnessing, directing, and controlling the energy and power of my ADHD brain involves accepting that I can no longer have a “do it ALL right now” approach to life and that going non-stop won’t help me move forward.
Each ADHD Success Club module seems to truly be the next piece of the ADHD success puzzle. I find myself both excited and overwhelmed: excited to see how much I’m changing yet overwhelmed because I cannot quite figure out how to put the puzzle pieces together.
The ADHD Success Club modules of the last two weeks have covered areas that have always been struggles for me: taking breaks/pauses and sleeping. Basically, I struggle with stopping and shutting down in a moment, for a day, or at night to sleep. While I hear Dana’s messages about The Power of the Pause as well as Sleep: The Essential Brain Booster, my awareness hasn’t translated into deliberate and thoughtful action.
For several years I’ve seen the consequences of sleep deprivation and little pause/downtime, and I’m frustrated because change takes time, and I know I can’t fix these problems all at once. As I write and process this, I am beginning to pause–slowing the thoughts spinning in my mind and stopping to consider what is getting in the way of my forward movement.
The mentors in my life have been leading me here for years. While I sometimes can’t remember what someone told me five minutes ago, powerful words of wisdom from mentors imprint themselves in my mind beginning with my dad who told me over twenty-five years ago that I was burning the candle at both ends and in the middle, too.
Many years ago, a spiritual mentor encouraged me to slow down and take small steps in my journey explaining how I can’t expect too much change at once. A few months ago a professional mentor of mine advised me to continue to keep my growth mindset as I work with Dana by avoiding zeroing in on what is going wrong and that I should instead build on how I can continue to grow. He also advised me to not lose sight of the big picture and think I need to stop what I’m doing.
Last week Dana paused in the moment while coaching me during the Action Call before explaining how adjusting habits can be very hard work. She advised me to begin with small steps, taking notice of what thoughts get in my way as well as what’s blocking me as I continue to make incremental changes.
When I have spinning thoughts, I find clarity by harnessing the positive thoughts that push me forward instead of latching on to the thoughts and behaviors that keep me stagnate. I need to be patient with myself and remember to slow down, notice what does and doesn’t work, build on what works, and keep moving forward . . . incrementally. Living successfully with ADHD requires me to be focused, strategic, and intentional.
Most of all, I need the patience to persevere and remember that focusing how I’ve been consistently inconsistent will get me nowhere. I need to work slowly and steadily being patient with myself. As Dana said, there are no magic wands to fix everything all at once. What Dana’s ADHD Success Club provides is the foundation for success along with the tools and support by breaking things down into manageable chunks.
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